Sometimes We Fail

WOD:
"Background Check"

2 rounds cals

3-3-3-1-1-1
max back squat: 145 lbs


12" AMRAP:

8 hang power cleans
12 chin ups
16 pushups
20 air squats

4.5 rounds (65 lb HPC's)



Despite being fairly happy with my performance in the WOD (I moved myself on down to the lower resistance band for chins), I was so, so angry about my enormous back squat fail. I dropped the bar with 165 lbs....twice. And not even a respectable "I know this isn't happening so I'll step out from under the bar now" drop either. I let myself get to the point where I couldn't actually take that step out and ended up falling over backwards. It was ugly to feel and I'm sure even uglier to watch. Had I not let my pride take control, I could have scaled it back 10 pounds and been absolutely happy with that. But noooooo.

I need to learn to shut everything out in those moments. Stop it with the "I'm the only girl here. Clock is running out. I only have one more chance to lift this. We won't do this again for a while and I need to do THIS weight NOW."....I let the mental part get muddy and instead of concentrating on getting back up (even if it had been with less weight), I focused on my moment of failure.

We have to get past that. Get past that split second of second guess-ture and move forward. Because it's all in your mind at that point. You know your body can do it. You just have to bring your thoughts into focus and stand up under that weight. It doesn't really matter what the weight is made of or how much it is....or even if it's real or imaginary. Just move it. And then thank God for your abilities. Because not everyone has them.