Alone Doesn't Feel So Cold...

My sister's last workday was Monday of this week. The office feels empty without her. She has no idea how much I look forward to having her here every summer. Her first summer spent working with me was four years ago....hard to believe. I was pregnant and her main job was to keep me hydrated. She did. But her companionship was what I appreciated most.

Most of the time I work by myself. The boss spends a lot of time outside of the office, which actually allows me to get more work done. But recently I've noticed that I don't like being alone all that much anymore. Whether I like it or not, I'm sort of becoming a people person.

"Just Put on Lucinda, Baby and Dance with Me..."

So it was on the drive in to work this morning that I realized I have failed as a mother. My son kept requesting - no, demanding - that we listen to Pink's "So What." (I actually had to Google that...I didn't know what it was called.) First, I need to explain WHY this piece of musical stupidity was in my possession in the first place. It was part of a mix cd and I had to take all or nothing.

I might be a music snob. No, I KNOW I'm a music snob. I judge people based solely on their taste (or lack thereof) in music....not really. But in true music snob fashion, other self-professed music snobs sort of piss me off. I don't listen to the radio, unless it's NPR and that doesn't count. Most of what I listen to I have found either by word of mouth or on soundtracks to bad indie films. I have a fondness for live music that goes beyond reason, being that I'm probably happiest positioned 15 feet from a live music stage, beer bottle in hand, lost in that moment of sound.

I love music that makes people feel. And I love to have others share with me the bands they love and why they love them. There are a few performers I will drop everything to sit or stand with for a couple of hours....because they make me feel.....something. I discovered my love for live music during a time when I was in a precarious place between numbness and overwhelming emotion. Music brought me out of the former and every once in a while plunged me into the latter, but for the most part it stabilized me.

Now excuse me, but I have to go introduce my son to someone named Lucinda....